Antidote to Shame and Self-Hatred

Ever since Glimpses of God’s Heart was published last December, I have been hearing from people whose lives are being positively impacted by the daily devotions in the book. Readers have posted beautiful reviews on the Amazon sites in Canada, Australia, the United Kingdom, and the United States. (You can read all of the reviews on the Endorsements page of this website.)

The Main Benefit of the Devotionals

One day I decided to take a good look at those reviews. I discovered that the main benefit readers noted was the power of the readings to help them to personally experience God’s love. They wrote things like:

·      The daily readings help me to realise the more fully, the depth of God’s unfathomable love for me. 

·      This is a beautifully written devotional book. You can feel and sense God’s love and encouragement. 

·      To be called God’s ‘treasure,’ ‘love,’ and ‘friend’ is a gift that…leaves one feeling affirmed and happy, assured of God’s unconditional love.

·      Author Gwen Wellington invites us, in tender-hearted devotionals, to open ourselves to God’s infinite parental compassion. 

·      This devotional is a wonderful daily reminder of God’s unconditional love for us.

·      Each day the devotional really spoke to my heart about (God’s) love for me. 

·      It permeates and saturates your mind, body and soul with the Love of (God). 

·      In a nutshell, these love-infused devotionals focus on some aspect of the love that God, Creator of the Universe, has for me...

What It Has Been Like to Be Reassured of God’s Love

Today I want to tell you what it has been like for me to receive, day after day, year after year, these beautiful assurances of God’s love for me.

Last July I had the opportunity to walk the halls in my high school. How well I remember cringing my way along those halls as a teenager! In those years – half a century ago – I hated myself and hoped that nobody would notice that I was there.

As is typical of people who have been traumatized by being treated badly by others, my response to the abuse I experienced as a child was to develop a deep sense of shame. By the time I was a teenager, I was convinced that I was despicable and that nobody would want to befriend me. I was desperately unhappy.

I managed to survive those years. I found solace in music and in being on the honor roll. And somehow, I also had hope for a positive future. (I think that was evidence of the Spirit of God giving me a future and a hope – Jeremiah 29:11).

Regular Antidotes to Shame and Self-Hatred

Fast forward to that day when I was thirty years old and made the decision to add, at the end of my daily devotions, the practice of being quiet and listening to what God might want to say to me. That was when I began receiving regular antidotes to my shame and self-hatred – all those protestations of God’s love that you can read in Glimpses of God’s Heart.

Those words were like drops of water that gradually softened the solid clod of clay my heart had become. If the God who created the ever-expanding universe loves me, maybe I am not so despicable. If God delights in me and sings songs over me, maybe there is something loveable about me.

And so, in response to God’s persistent affirmations of love, I have come to love and to appreciate myself. I have replaced my ragged coat of shame with a shimmering coat of joy.

Let me share with you just two of those many love notes.

Two of Those Many Love Notes

(February 23 in Glimpses of Gods Heart)

My love, my treasure:

Know that your heart and mine beat as one –

we are totally in sync, you and I.

My desires are your desires; your desires are my desires.

I am making a way for you

and I will show you how to walk in it.

My love, you have come to me again and again

with the request to live a life that imitates that of Jesus.

I have heard this and I have instigated it.

My intention is to do it.

So continue to lift your face up to me.

Continue to receive my love.

Know that I am cradling your face in my hands,

I am smiling into your eyes,

and I am blowing you kisses all the time.

And when I’m not doing that,

I’m singing happy songs over you!

I delight in you, my child!

Rest in my love

and wait to see my Spirit at work in and through you

to bless this hurting world.

(April 26 in Glimpses of Gods Heart)

My treasure, my love:

Why are you so downcast?

What lie are you believing that is creating this despair?

The truth, my love, is that you are blessed immeasurably.

If you could see the truth of your existence,

you would laugh.

Yes, you would laugh!

Feeling shame and despair is an old habit.

It is old and worn out – like a tattered trench coat.

You need to take it off

and put on a new, beautiful coat of joy.

You’ve done your time in the trenches.

Get out of there and throw off that ragged coat!

Lift your face to the sun of my smile and laugh.

Put on your multi-colored coat of iridescent joy and laugh.

Laugh to your good health!

I am resolutely committed to doing everything I can to get a copy of Glimpses of God’s Heart into as many hands as possible so that as many people as possible also will experience how much God adores them!

I’d love to hear what you have to say about the book, the website, or any of these blogs. Please add your comments below!